Saturday, June 5, 2010

Change, happiness, personal power ... strength

I’ve been in a mood since Tuesday. I have had Bones for almost 17 years and I really don’t remember life without him. Actually, life in the US has been with him only. I’ve been thinking about death this week and how final it is. But is it?

The day that Bonesy died I was sitting outside thinking about him and crying when a huge yellow butterfly flies right in front of me. It made me stop for a moment to think whether that was a sign from my pup or not. It just seemed like this whole week whenever I thought about him and was sad, a yellow butterfly would appear out of nowhere. I saw one again in my backyard, while driving down a really busy street and while talking to my friend in the front yard just to name a few instances.

I always meditate prior to a reading. When the weather is nice I like to sit outside to meditate. It’s been hard for me to do that this week because I want to see Bonesy lying in the grass but obviously he’s not there. While I was thinking about him and how I was going to do this reading another yellow butterfly comes skipping along. So then I ask, is death really final? I feel this is a clear message from my pup telling me that he’s doing great.

The message that butterfly gives us is about change, joy and color. It is a symbol of the soul. Anytime I think of a butterfly, I think colors and happiness. Butterflies make us want to transform ourselves; break free of anything that’s holding us back to bust out with color and dance. They remind us not to take life and things so seriously. Butterfly goes through a lot of change in its life but with grace and ease. Nature in general doesn’t struggle with itself when change occurs. I believe the message from butterfly is just that; accept change with grace and ease.

I had to think about the color yellow and its significance. The color yellow is associated with our third chakra which is the Solar Plexus; the area right above our navel and below our ribcage. This chakra is the energy center associated with our personal power, inner harmony and identity. It is the “sun” color and makes us feel happy. Yellow is the color associated with taking our power back and being in control of our lives. Yellow allows us to accept change with grace.

When I combined the two thoughts of yellow and butterfly, I realized what my pup was trying to tell me. He’s gone through a change which he has accepted with ease and grace but also his power is back. While looking through some pictures of him this week, I remembered how much he stood on his hind legs only, how picky he was about things and how lively he really was. It’s hard to see a body slow down like his did and still remember how lively that being was at one point. He would sit on the couch on his butt with his back leaning on the pillows. He looked like a little kid on it and not a dog. My Bonesy was full of life and spunk. He is truly free of the body that could not keep up with him anymore and he sent me a clear sign telling me about it.

My son is incredible at doing readings and his words were “Bonesy is in heaven playing with his friends at the park. He’s running around getting his legs stronger and his tail is growing back.” Bonesy’s tail got amputated when my son was two so he truly had no recollection of Bones with a tail. That was yet another sign that my pup is doing great.

So I ask is death really final? The answer for me is absolutely not! It’s just a transformation leaving us with the task of finding a different relationship with those who have passed. The yellow butterfly has given me my smile back too. It has allowed me to accept the change with as much grace as I can have right now and to remember how powerful I truly am.

I miss you and love you Bonesy Bear! Thank you for the gift of the yellow butterflies!

Your human mommy,

1 comment:

  1. Mary, this was a really great post. I've been thinking a lot about mortality lately. It seems like everyone in my life is getting older for the first time. The lesson I learned with Bonesy is to remember the vitality of a being and treat them with that dignity even after they can no longer take care of themselves as opposed to the frustration that comes with the incoveniences. I'm surely spending a lot more time thinking about how to make our other dogs remaining time more enjoyable and hopefully that will translate into a more caring, thoughtful approach to the aging of my more immediate relatives when that time comes. It also has gotten me to think a lot about the now. I always think that in 3 months I'll get a deal or something great is going to happen and then everything is going to be great. The reality is i'll never be younger, healthier and have more vitality than i have today, so everything else is just noise. Carpe Dium!