Monday, June 28, 2010

Your Happy Place

I attended an Abraham-Hicks workshop last Saturday that was truly amazing. It left me uplifted and energized. Esther Hicks channels an entity known as Abraham the entire duration of the workshop. They mostly have brought forth teachings and books on the Law of Attraction. Throughout the workshop they referred to something called "the vortex" which I simplify as being “your happy place.”

Go To Your Happy Place Often

It is a necessity to go to your happy place as often as you can. The thought is that when you’re in your happy place, you will be vibrating at a higher energy level. This in turn will bring to you more positive and joyous experiences.

Try to remember at all times that we are energy beings and what we send out, is exactly what we receive. Sure things happen in life that pull you away from feeling good, but as long as you’ve made that commitment to yourself to feel good, then you will go back to your happy place sooner rather than later.

Create Your Experiences

My five year old son constantly says to me, “He made me do it!” and my response always is, “No one can make you do anything, it is always your choice as to how your react to something.” I want him to grow up feeling empowered with the knowledge that he is the creator of all his circumstances.

We are creators of everything and victims of nothing. We can choose to get our feelings hurt if someone speaks to us rudely or we can choose to say, “Too bad for them that they feel the need to talk to someone this way, however I am not leaving my happy place because of that interaction.” It really doesn’t matter what the circumstance may be, we always have the choice of how to deal with it and to remain in our happy place.

Take a step back

Esther Hicks brought forth a concept that I hadn’t considered before. She said that when we manifest we need to be in that happy place or vortex as she refers to it. How can you solve a problem when you’re in the midst of it? It’s the idea of taking a step back and looking into the situation with an open mind. We always come up with a better solution when we “sleep on it” anyway. I find that if I ever make a decision in the heat of the moment, I will most likely regret it later.

It’s nice to think that we have all the time in the world and there’s really no rush on anything. How true is that? We have all of eternity to get our stuff done so we might as well take our time and enjoy the ride.

Stop and smell the roses!

Speaking of enjoying the ride, why not take our time figuring out what we’d really like to have and enjoy the process of getting there? I found myself getting a little uptight these past couple of weeks. It turns out that I truly need to just sit outside in my garden and do nothing every morning otherwise I don’t feel whole. I was so busy with my schedule and that of the kids’, that I didn’t have time to just be, and that was making life feel out of control.

Take the time to meditate, appreciate all the blessings in your life, compliment someone, admire works of art, be in nature, pet your dog, hang out with friends, and the list goes on of ideas on how to stay in your happy place.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

I love being in my happy place!
Mary

Friday, June 25, 2010

Treat others as you'd like to be treated!

I've been thinking about this concept for a while now. You always hear that you should treat others as they treat you, but I say, "Treat others as you'd like to be treated." I truly believe in the saying, “What goes around comes around.”

Bob

I dated a guy, let’s called him Bob, about six months before I met my husband. It was a whirlwind of four weeks with him. Within two weeks of dating, he confessed that he loved me and wanted to spend the rest of time with me. Two weeks later, he decided that he no longer felt anything for me and proceeded break up with me while I was battling a horrendous flu. The timing of his break-up wasn’t perfect but it was what it was. In hindsight, I think he just didn’t want to spend the holidays alone because his proposal coincided with the week of Christmas. Hmmm, maybe it was all timed on his part. Anyway, about four months later, I met the man of my dreams who I am still very happily married to today. By the following Christmas, I was head over heels in love.

Karma

I ran into Bob one afternoon around Christmastime at Starbucks. Bob looked awful; he had to use a walking stick to get around due to a slipped disk in his back and his girlfriend had just dumped him after confessing to him that she loved him. These were Bob’s exact words to me, “What kind of a person breaks up with someone after saying they loved them and wanted to marry them?” I didn’t say to Bob, “You do” because I honestly felt so bad for him, but his friends kindly pointed that out to him. Bob’s friends were my friends too and they told me that he was totally perplexed as to why his girlfriend would have done that to him. I didn’t totally understand the concept of “karma” back then but I do now.

Someone is keeping score, I swear it!

I wonder if God has a record-keeper somewhere whose job is to keep the Universe in balance. And because I wonder about that, I never cheat on line calls in tennis, I always return the cart at the grocery store and I certainly never fib to my mother.

Seriously

The Universe is completely balanced at all times: there’s night and day, summer and winter, leaves growing and falling, etc. I wonder if our actions, and therefore, their equal and opposite reactions must be balanced too. I also wonder if karma gets carried from one lifetime to the next. At the Abraham-Hicks conference this past weekend, they said no. They said that the death experience brings all experiences to a close. I don’t know if I’m fully convinced of that thought yet. I don’t do good because I’m afraid of karma, I do good because that’s what I want to attract into my life. Your thoughts create your experiences. Allow your thoughts and actions to bring the best into your life. You think awesome and be awesome to attract awesome, you think joy and be joy to attract joy, etc.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

Always treating people the way I’d like to be treated!

Mary

Friday, June 18, 2010

Your thoughts create your experiences!

You produce what you are. Isn’t that a fantastic statement? Think about it. This makes you realize that everything in your life is a product of your thoughts. An apple tree produces nothing but apples. A strawberry patch produces nothing but strawberries. A giraffe gives birth to a giraffe. Do you see the trend? You produce what you are. Humans are thought. We think all the time. Try to stop thinking if you can. Have you driven yourself crazy yet?

I am able to slow my thinking down while in an awesome meditation, but I am never truly able to completely stop thinking. It’s just what we do as humans. We think and then think some more. I’d like for you to think about the following questions for a moment: What are you thinking about? Are your thoughts positive? Do you tend to be a little more pessimistic? Is the glass half full or half empty? Do you tend to use “positive” or “negative” words in your speech? As an example, do you say, “I cannot stand being late!” or “I love being on time.” Do you notice the difference in the two statements?

Noticing your thoughts is the first step to take when trying to use the Law of Attraction to manifest anything in our life. I just gave this assignment to a client who called me about understanding the Law of Attraction better. I told her that she needed to spend a week noticing her thoughts. Being that our thoughts produce all our experiences, then we ought to be aware of what they truly are. Also, start changing any negative thought you may have to a positive one. It is the simplest thing to do once you are aware of it. Any time we reach for the better feeling, we are enhancing our experiences. You will also start noticing trends in your friends. Facebook is such a great place for that. You know the friends whose posts are, “The weather is crappy again today” versus “Good morning everyone! I hope you have a fantastic day!”

I hardly ever watch the news anymore. I do read it as an application on my phone because reading it doesn’t have the same effect as watching it for me. You’ll find that when you start reaching for that better feeling, you also won’t be able to handle as much negativity coming your way as well. It is essential to be very picky as to what we bring into our experience. We are the creators of our Universe. I cannot stress that thought enough. That being said, choose the experiences you’d like to have in your life. Only allow the people who bring you happiness in your life. Choose to engage in the activities that bring you the most joy. Sign up for the volunteer situation that enhances your experiences. Choose the job that is most gratifying.

Nothing is set in stone therefore shape it to be what you want it to be. Choose your experiences rather than react to what’s coming. Feel the power of creating your own experiences and start today.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

Using the power of positive thoughts to create my experience!

Mary

Monday, June 14, 2010

The treasure embedded within ...

The anniversary of the day I lost Isabella and almost my life is coming up on June 23rd. I remember last year around this time feeling like I just wanted this mess to be over. I was 19 weeks pregnant, bleeding and on bed rest. It was total misery. The weeks following the loss were absolutely horrendous. I was severely anemic, my muscles had atrophied from being on bed rest and my emotions were shot. I couldn’t even walk around the park without being in excruciating pain.

It all started turning around in October when I went to Wayne Dyer’s workshop in Maui. I remember sitting on the beach in Maui thinking, “Yes, I just lost a 20 week pregnancy, but here I am with my feet in the sand, watching the waves come and go while my husband is taking care of my boys at home.” My husband called while I was sitting there and the whole conversation was about how much he loved me and the boys missed me. I remember the feelings of over-whelming love encompassing me and I thought I was the luckiest woman in the world.

Now, almost a year later, I still feel like I’m the luckiest woman in the world. I was at a farewell party for one of my friends yesterday, and I got the opportunity to catch up with a lot of people I hadn’t seen since way before Isabella. I told one of my friends that at this point in time, I don’t necessarily see all the blessings from this experience. I went on to say that it’s true I feel that I am a lot calmer, have more joy and definitely don’t engage in any drama. I also feel like I’m a lot more grounded and absolutely love living. I continued to say, “I guess if I spend the rest of my life being this way, then in 30 or 40 years I can look back at this experience and say it was worth it.” That’s when the epiphany happened.

I have been in a mode of resenting Isabella for this experience for a few months now. Just the other day, I thought, someday I’ll be able to say “thank you” to her, but not just yet. Now I realize that I will be able to say “thank you” sooner than I thought. I was in the mode of feeling that this experience was way too big for the benefits. That thought is absolutely true less than a year removed. It would not be true 30 years from now though, when I have lived every day finding the blessing in it. I wake up every morning with gratitude for waking up next to a husband I adore, having kids that are fantastic, wonderful friends, living in Colorado, being able to travel, etc. Simply put, I love everything about everything right now and I believe it’s because I was given the opportunity to almost die.

Dying seemed so far away when I was 35, but it almost did happen. So now I say, “Forget the drama, life is too short to worry about the small stuff.”

I say to you, “Don’t worry about the small stuff either! Enjoy every moment and find the treasure embedded in every experience. Trust me, there is one, you may just have to search for it or be patient for it to reveal itself to you, but it is there.”

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

Grateful for finding the treasure embedded in the experience of losing a 20-week baby and almost my life!

Mary

Friday, June 11, 2010

Fear ... what to do with it?

I had a reading done on Tuesday evening. I wanted to hear from my pup to make sure he was doing great. My friend did the reading for me and she was amazing. She picked up on the fact that I smelled the towel that I had wrapped him in on the way to the vet every day since he passed; she picked up on the fact that he never lost his puppy spirit and that he always faked a limp to get some attention. He was so cute with that fake limp and I had forgotten all about it. He would do it every once in a while and it was totally convincing. Then when offered a treat, he would totally forget his limp and run to get it. It was so great to remember that! Before the reading I knew in my gut that he was OK, but I wanted that validation from someone else. I felt so light and happy.

Then she started channeling messages from Isabella. I don’t know if this will make sense to anyone, but I am at a place where I don’t really want to know what Isabella has to say. I feel like that chapter of my life is over; I’d like to just have peace and happiness. Nevertheless, I did get some messages that made sense. She said that I may have chosen this experience so that I can help others who may go through a similar situation. She said this experience has also made me realize how strong I truly am. Louie, my oldest son, had done a reading for me before where he said that Isabella had changed her mind. My friend validated that for me as well. She felt like it wasn’t necessarily destined to have this outcome, but that was something that Isabella chose along the way. All these things make sense, but the experience itself seems way too big to justify the gain out of it. I still feel that I’m at peace with what happened though because it is in the past and I’m not one to dwell there.

After my two boys, I never contemplated having a third child. I was content with the two highly energetic ones I had. I got so many messages to have another child that I felt like it was a must to respond to those feelings. However, now, after this experience, I have an intense desire to make our family bigger. If my husband would go for it, I would adopt two children. It sounds crazy, but it’s almost like now I want to have that other kid or kids, darn it!

I mentioned this to my friend and told her about my desire to have more children. That’s when she said that there was another baby coming and she’d be extremely surprised if I didn’t have another one. That statement brought such fear to my entire being that I didn’t know what to do with it. I realized how much fear it invoked in me because what I actually heard her say is, “she would be surprised if I did have more kids.” My friend, Jacqueline, was with me during this reading and she promptly corrected my assumption. I can’t even imagine nine months of wondering whether this baby was going to make it or not. My kids want another child, I want another child, but at this point in time I lack the gumption to try to have another.

This is where I’m at today. Do I allow fear to stand in the way of what it is I truly desire? I have never let fear stand in the way of anything I wanted to do before. It’s not like it wasn’t fearful to announce to the world that I was psychic, or to parachute out of an airplane, or to parapont off the side of a mountain, or to deliver my second child at home and so on. I have definitely tested myself and I know for a fact that I have gumption. Will I have the necessary gumption to go for another pregnancy? I guess only time will tell.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

Choosing to enjoy the messages I got from my pup!
Mary

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Taking a moment to decide ...

I truly believe that we all come to Earth for personal growth. We choose a few things to work on during our lifetime often referred to as contracts. Examples of contracts are: we will learn how to set boundaries, have joy, achieve balance, deal with abandonment, learn how to receive, learn how to give, have patience, etc. We will definitely encounter experiences that will help us to identify and master our contracts. Anything we see as a repetitive occurrence in our lives will most likely be a lesson for us. If you’re someone who is constantly abandoned, then maybe you have an abandonment contract: if you seem to do things to the extreme, then maybe you have a balance contract and so on.

Contracts are definitely something we choose to take on prior to incarnating. We will most likely choose a total of three or four at most to work on. I will give you an example of two of my contracts: joy and boundaries. I’ve talked about my joy contract quite a bit in previous posts. I seem to be doing much better with being in a state of gratitude and therefore joy on a more regular basis. It was definitely something I had to identify so that I can work on. People and situations will come into your life to help you with your contracts. My husband, as an example, is a key person in my joy contract. He may wake up saying, “isn’t this a fantastic day!” There may not be anything special going on that day other than the weather is beautiful. It took me a while to realize that he was teaching me how to have joy in my every day.

Another of my contracts is setting boundaries. My boundary contract appears in the form of me not being able to say "no," or not realizing when someone is crossing a line with me. It could happen in the simplest ways. Boundaries could appear at the grocery store when someone cuts the line, or when someone does not respect your wish of not talking about something or asking you to do something that is somewhat outrageous, or making plans with you to cancel constantly, and so on. My boundary contract was definitely the toughest thing I had to overcome. I remember sweating on the phone wondering how I would say "no," to someone if I really didn’t want to do what they proposed. It’s like a baby taking its first steps, I had to practice.

I tell my clients who suffer from boundary issues not to answer the phone right away or give the answer on the spot. Sometimes when we have a few moments to think about something, we can check with our gut to see how we really feel about it. Take the time necessary to make sure you’re not signing yourself up for something that makes you unhappy. After playing my tennis match last night, I had to ask myself if this is something that makes me happy. During the match, I wasn’t having any fun, so I had to figure out why. I realized it’s because I was playing in stifling heat, so now I know that the next time it’s that hot I will just have to decline playing that night. I may also decide against playing league tennis where I don’t feel obligated to a team to show up. I almost fainted on the court last night and I didn’t think that was worth it for tennis.

A lot of intuitive people have trouble with boundaries. It seems like if we had clear cut boundaries then how could we possibly connect with the spirit world. With that said, it is essential to maintain some healthy boundaries for our well-being. We need to check in with ourselves to realize what makes us whole and happy. If we’re being pulled in way too many directions, then that serves to do nothing other than to completely scatter our energy.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

Realizing when to say no!
Mary

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Change, happiness, personal power ... strength

I’ve been in a mood since Tuesday. I have had Bones for almost 17 years and I really don’t remember life without him. Actually, life in the US has been with him only. I’ve been thinking about death this week and how final it is. But is it?

The day that Bonesy died I was sitting outside thinking about him and crying when a huge yellow butterfly flies right in front of me. It made me stop for a moment to think whether that was a sign from my pup or not. It just seemed like this whole week whenever I thought about him and was sad, a yellow butterfly would appear out of nowhere. I saw one again in my backyard, while driving down a really busy street and while talking to my friend in the front yard just to name a few instances.

I always meditate prior to a reading. When the weather is nice I like to sit outside to meditate. It’s been hard for me to do that this week because I want to see Bonesy lying in the grass but obviously he’s not there. While I was thinking about him and how I was going to do this reading another yellow butterfly comes skipping along. So then I ask, is death really final? I feel this is a clear message from my pup telling me that he’s doing great.

The message that butterfly gives us is about change, joy and color. It is a symbol of the soul. Anytime I think of a butterfly, I think colors and happiness. Butterflies make us want to transform ourselves; break free of anything that’s holding us back to bust out with color and dance. They remind us not to take life and things so seriously. Butterfly goes through a lot of change in its life but with grace and ease. Nature in general doesn’t struggle with itself when change occurs. I believe the message from butterfly is just that; accept change with grace and ease.

I had to think about the color yellow and its significance. The color yellow is associated with our third chakra which is the Solar Plexus; the area right above our navel and below our ribcage. This chakra is the energy center associated with our personal power, inner harmony and identity. It is the “sun” color and makes us feel happy. Yellow is the color associated with taking our power back and being in control of our lives. Yellow allows us to accept change with grace.

When I combined the two thoughts of yellow and butterfly, I realized what my pup was trying to tell me. He’s gone through a change which he has accepted with ease and grace but also his power is back. While looking through some pictures of him this week, I remembered how much he stood on his hind legs only, how picky he was about things and how lively he really was. It’s hard to see a body slow down like his did and still remember how lively that being was at one point. He would sit on the couch on his butt with his back leaning on the pillows. He looked like a little kid on it and not a dog. My Bonesy was full of life and spunk. He is truly free of the body that could not keep up with him anymore and he sent me a clear sign telling me about it.

My son is incredible at doing readings and his words were “Bonesy is in heaven playing with his friends at the park. He’s running around getting his legs stronger and his tail is growing back.” Bonesy’s tail got amputated when my son was two so he truly had no recollection of Bones with a tail. That was yet another sign that my pup is doing great.

So I ask is death really final? The answer for me is absolutely not! It’s just a transformation leaving us with the task of finding a different relationship with those who have passed. The yellow butterfly has given me my smile back too. It has allowed me to accept the change with as much grace as I can have right now and to remember how powerful I truly am.

I miss you and love you Bonesy Bear! Thank you for the gift of the yellow butterflies!

Your human mommy,
Mary

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Bonesy Bear ... my puppy

My dog made his way back to heaven today. Bonesy, as he was called in our home, was 17 years and 3 weeks old. He was born May 8, 1993. I bought him for $75 from an ad in the paper. He was six months old when I got him. I was sitting in the living room of the people who owned him when he ran into the room and did a complete 360 to look me right in the eye. It was love at first sight. I had to have him. They had named him Nolan Ryan but I called him Bono after the lead singer in U2. I absolutely loved that band and felt that was a great name for my pup.

He was so incredibly adorable; he had fluffy white hair, brown eyes that looked right into my soul and a feisty personality. He was my guardian angel for sure. I had just moved from Lebanon a few months before I got him and I was very much homesick still. I would come home after a long day at school or a night out with my friends where I felt a little sad and would just cry into his fur. He would just sit there and let me do what I needed to feel better. I lived with my brother at the time who didn’t necessarily care for dogs that much but he loved Bonesy. Bonesy ate through my brother’s shoes, sweaters, the carpet by the front door, the double doors to the kitchen and the list could go on for a while. I would take him to the park by our condo in Dallas where he would just run around with all the other dogs during our afternoon doggy play dates. He could be across the park on the other side but if I mentioned the word treat he would sprint all the way back. I absolutely loved that dog from the first minute I got him. My friends would tease me that I carried him around like a baby. He was my baby. I would take him only to the best groomers to make sure they cut his hair into a cute teddy bear haircut. He had my heart and everything just followed.

I took Bonesy with me everywhere I went. I had him for five years before I even met my husband. He went with me to Lebanon one year where he had the best summer ever. I remember people at the airport thinking I was nuts to bring my pup with me. I would take him to the mountains for hikes. He loved sticking his head out the window and letting the breeze hit his face. He loved life and enjoyed every minute of it.

Bonesy was not the type of dog that had any smell to him at all. He never lost his puppy coat so he was always soft and smelled awesome. The one time that he stunk in his life was when I dated a guy he didn’t like. I would get him out of the bath and he would be totally stinky. He knew that wasn’t the right guy for me and drove him away. When I met my husband, Bonesy rolled over on his back and let my husband pet him. He loved my husband from the first moment they met.

We moved to Colorado when he was seven. He was a pure bred Lhasa Apso so he totally loved the cooler weather. We would find him on the back porch sitting in the snow letting it collect on top of him for hours. When my oldest son was born, Bonesy jumped on the couch and wouldn’t let anyone touch him. He was protecting him even from us. It was just too cute to see.

About five year ago Bonesy got cancer on his tail. I tried to treat it naturally but nothing worked. At times, dogs take on our burden and I totally feel that he was taking that illness on for me so that I could learn to have balance in my life. I remember the day before we had to amputate his tail, I found him laying in the corner of the pantry, I told him that if he pulled through this that I promise I would learn to balance my life and give time for me. He looked into my eyes with those old soul brown eyes of his and he made me feel like he understood. He pulled through and I kept my promise of creating time for myself even though I had two little boys.

Last year about two weeks after losing the baby, Bonesy had his first seizure that I witnessed. I told my husband that I didn’t want him to suffer and that we needed to help him if needed. He had a few more of those but he pulled out of them. I told my husband that Bones has always taken care of me and that he would stick around until I was stronger and that’s when he’ll go. I made him pots and pots of chicken soup which was his absolute favorite. I would cook eggs, bacon and rice for him. I gave my puppy all the love that I could give.

I told him today that he needed to still take care of me and that I would miss him tremendously. Bones would play with a treat for 15 minutes before eating it. He would throw it from left to right, run around it and just have fun with it. That’s the image I have in my head of my pup. He’s finally free of the body that no longer kept up with his spirit. I’m going to repeat my thought of last week. What if my puppy was born into heaven today and he’s going to make someone there extremely happy like he did for me for 17 years. I love my puppy and always will. I called on Saint Francis, Archangel Michael, Archangel Raphael and my dad to help my pup with his transition.

I love you Bonesy Bear my little fluffer nutter! I will miss you but I know you will always be with me.

Your human mommy,
Mary