Friday, August 28, 2009

Anyone up for a walk?

A few years ago, one of my dearest friends was diagnosed with breast cancer. I remember the day she told me; I felt like the ground had given away beneath me and I thought I was going to collapse. I just couldn't imagine it. I couldn't imagine what she was going through or how the next few months were going to look. I just remember walking around in a fog for a few weeks and praying really hard that my dear friend would beat the cancer and have that become a memory. I am happy to say that she did! It was such a relief to hear the words "I am cancer free!" YAY what a feeling.

This morning another dear friend of mine is walking the Breast Cancer 3 day benefiting Susan G. Komen for the cure. She has trained for months and it's finally here. She's excited, I'm excited, our city is excited "GO WALKERS!!" She is walking in honor of my dear friend and others who BEAT the cancer but she is also walking in memory of some who didn't. Every mile she walks will hopefully get us one step closer to a cure.

With the anticipation of the walk beginning I've been thinking about my girlfriends and the women in my life a lot these few days. I thought about how many things we will face together; cancer, remission, infertility, adoption, miscarriages, divorces, marriages, new babies, our kids starting kindergarten, kids going to college, menopause ... and many more. It made me want to say that we are a resilient bunch ready to take on life by its horns and enjoy every moment of it. For you my girlfriends, mother, aunts, mother-in-law and sisters-in-law I dedicate this blog to you. May we continue to share all moments of life together.

A few days ago, I wasn't feeling well at all. I was very emotional, upset and tired. It took for me to have a huge cathartic cry on the shoulders of my husband, brother and friend. So for all the men out there that have women in your life and are there for them I dedicate this blog to you as well. Your role is very important in our lives as well and we love having you there.

I would love to hear your thoughts. Email me to, post a comment or find me on Facebook.

I'm off to a cheering station! I hope I don't cry like a small child when I see my friend walking with thousands of others. If I do cry, oh well I'm not one to bottle it in :)


Monday, August 3, 2009

Still grieving? Really? Why?

My friend Jacqueline attended the Abraham seminar a few weeks ago when they were in Denver. Abraham is an entity who is channeled by a woman named Esther Hicks. She and her husband Jerry travel throughout the country hosting seminars. I love the teachings of Abraham; they are always so empowering.

Jacqueline was telling me that what stuck with her from the seminar was what Abraham thought about grief. Abraham says that if we understood how awesome it was to die then we wouldn't even spend a moment in grief. I've thought about that statement a lot lately. The reality is though that doesn't seem to be the case. We do spend more than 1 moment in grief; we probably spend years in grief. Why is that?

Is it because of what society expects us to do or is it because of how we feel about it? I'm Lebanese and there it's cultural to wear black for up to a year in mourning. Can you imagine that? Not being able to wear anything with any color in it for a year of more.

I feel part of what keeps us in grief is due to the reactions of people around us as well. It's human nature to imagine what we would do in another's situation which is really unfair to everyone. I believe we've all signed up for our life experiences to grow and evolve. Therefore, most likely I can handle most anything that occurs to me because on some level I was expecting it. I've had so many people call me to say that they wouldn't know what to do or how to get through losing a child at the stage that I did. I would answer to that "why would they know and honestly why would they imagine themselves in that situation?" They will have their own set of life experiences that I probably will never encounter because it is not something I chose for myself.

I've also thought about the fact that it seems that any sad event that happens to us seems to negate ALL the happy times we have. The sad event becomes in the forefront of our minds not allowing us to fully live the life we are meant to live.

I would say that my wedding day was one of the best days of my life. We got married in Puerto Rico on top of a 300 foot cliff overlooking the ocean; the view was breathtaking. We had 75 friends and family members there. It was truly a magical day. The day that my oldest son was born was an incredible journey into motherhood. I wouldn't say that I knew all the joy that day would bring into my life but I do now. My second son was born at home. It was the most peaceful birth anyone could hope for. It was a tender moment for our family when my husband, my 2 boys and I took a 4 hour nap that afternoon together. Every day since having my boys has been brought many moments of joy.

There are other experiences or memories I can draw on as well are maybe not as life-changing but incredible nonetheless. I remember feeling awestruck with the view from the top of a fourteener I hiked when I first moved to Colorado. I felt like I had conquered the world. The happy memories will go on and on if I allow the memory flood gates to open. Going out with my friends, traveling to Hawaii, seeing our extended family ... etc. The wonderful memories are endless.

I've always said that anything that happens to us in our lives is just a life experience and it is a choice as to how you're going to react to it. I'm sure you know plenty of people who are happy regardless of their life experiences and some you are sad or mad regardless of where they are as well.

It is a choice. What is your choice going to be?

Let me know what you think! I would love for you to leave a comment on this website if you so choose otherwise email me to or leave me a message on facebook.