Monday, May 31, 2010

It's always a choice

I was up at 6 am this morning. I love getting up fully rested and early enough to enjoy the day before everyone else wakes up. I decided to go out and weed the garden beds this morning. It’s so peaceful to be out there with the birds chirping, the sun making its way through all the leaves of the trees and a little chill in the air. It was such an awesome meditation; me and the dirt. I didn’t even wear any gloves because I wanted to get the full experience of my hands being in the soil. It’s such a grounding experience.

I have been thinking about the title of this post for a while now. I think in blogs all the time but they take a while to jell in my head before I can write them and it jelled while weeding. The thought behind this blog is “choose not to get offended.” My friend was telling me the other day about how some of her friends and family were annoying her. I told her to make the choice of not getting offended. She had to think about that for a while and how she would go about doing that. I truly find that thought liberating. Sometimes we waste so much time worrying about what someone meant or why they did something when it’s really nothing to do with us and everything to do with them.

It seems like I’ve been playing a lot of tennis lately. I play on a mixed doubles league which I love because I get to play with my hubby. A friend of mine got paired with a person she didn’t know before but heard all sorts of things about his behavior on the court being very poor. I was asking her about it the other day when she responded that whenever he does display bad behavior she pays no attention to it because she realized that was how he processed the game and it really wasn’t about her at all. So many other people chose to get offended by his behavior where she decided to let it be. The result is that they have won every match they’ve ever played together because she plays her game and has allowed him to play his.

It’s really never about the other person anyway. Whenever someone evokes in us feelings of anger, aggravation or anything else the question we need to ask ourselves is “why did that affect me?” If you stop to ask yourself that question you’ll realize it’s because you were tired or you need to set the boundary with them or whatever. It’s always going to be about adjusting your behavior if you got offended. There are times when we need to deal with people differently and when a person aggravates us then it’s up to us to make that change.

Choose to be free of other people’s actions, opinions, choices and thoughts. Choose to be about what makes you happy and live life that way. Trust me you will feel extremely liberated and much happier.

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The choice is to be happy!

Thursday, May 27, 2010

There's only living

I attended a memorial service today for one of my friends. Sue Combes passed away on May 17, 2010. She and I attended the same spiritual program for two years. She was one of those people who could read a situation for what it was and call you out on it. Her questions were such that you were left thinking for days after you thought you had answered them. I feel bad that we hadn’t really been in touch for the past year or so. Each of us was dealing with our own struggles; mine with miscarriages and hers with cancer. I will miss her.

The reverend told a metaphorical story about how we on earth say goodbye to those we love when they pass and how those on the other side are greeting them. Just like when a baby is born we are so happy to welcome that baby into the world then maybe death is being born in heaven. Maybe Sue’s parents and relatives who have passed before her are ecstatic to see her. He also allowed us to think then when babies become toddlers and toddlers become young children that we never mourn them moving from one phase to another. Death is exactly that; it’s moving from one phase to another. He also talked about the fact that we all have to find another form of relationship with Sue. We may no longer be able to pick up the phone and call or email her but the communication lines are still open for that relationship. I found all these ideas to be full of hope.

I had thought about these ideas throughout my dealings with grief. In reality there’s only living; whether it’s living on earth or living in Heaven it’s truly only living. The hardest part is adjusting to the lack of that physical contact but that person is still there. Our loved ones will send us signs that they are OK if we ask for that reassurance. I remember one night while I was still living in Lebanon I came home around 7 pm. The electricity was out and it was raining pretty hard. I had the feeling of being somewhat spooked when I just thought of my dad. At that moment every light in the house turned on and I mean every single light. It was amazing. I remember the day that my son was getting christened my brothers were coming in town and I thought that it would’ve been nice to have my dad there too. While thinking that thought, the song “butterfly kisses” came on the radio which always reminded me of my dad. These are not coincidences rather they are messages from my dad that he is there with me when I need him.

There are various ways that spirits can communicate with us. They can affect energy so they may dim lights, turn on remote control objects or things of that nature. They can send us songs, flowers or coins. I always tell people that if something reminds you of the person then it’s probably a sign from them. My dad seems to mess with energy or send me songs the most. We used to have a remote control car for my kids that would just randomly turn on lights or move forward and backward. My husband, mom, the two kids and I were sitting around one day after my boys’ birthday when this remote control car started blinking its lights. I told them that I thought it was my dad because I had invited him to come to the birthday. So my husband says “Joe if that’s you then blink the light three times” the car would blink three times, then he’d say “make it go forward” and the car would go forward. It was really wild that we communicated with my dad for a few minutes. He was there to let us know that he had attended his grandkids’ birthday party. It was total validation that they are always with us and they are truly living.

Sue, I wish you peace. You will be missed tremendously.

If you have any questions on your loved ones trying to communicate with you please feel free to email me to, leave me a comment below or find me on Facebook at


Monday, May 24, 2010

Enough already!

I just got back from a drumming circle hosted by my teacher and friend Jan Katayama. I love drumming circles because they are a fantastic meditation. There’s something about that beat of the drum which allows you an awesome meditation when you connect with it. If you’ve never experienced a drumming circle I would highly suggest it. I know Jan has them in the Denver area all the time; you can look up the schedule on her website at

I decided to write a post tonight on a subject that I’ve been thinking about for a while now. I have been thinking about the Law of Attraction and what to use it for. The Law of Attraction says that if you think about something, feel it with you being and believe it will come to you then it must come. So the other day I was thinking well when do we stop trying to manifest something else and just be content with what we have right now. If we’re constantly searching for the next thing to come to be happy then we’re never happy because we’re always waiting.

Then I started to realize the thought behind “just be present and be happy.” There’s always something that we can strive to achieve but on some level that does take away from the moment we are living right now. I feel great that the Law of Attraction is out there for me to take advantage of when I want to manifest something in my life. At this moment in time though I am content being where I’m at because there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. I love life! I love living, I love my husband, I love my boys, I love my family, I love my friends, I love my dogs, I love my car, I love my house and the list could go on and on for days. I truly love everything that is going on right now and it’s a choice that I’m making to be 100% in the moment at all times. I can’t deny that I wouldn’t love another child and total financial security but I’m saying that before I go to bed I am in a state of gratitude for all that is right now.

My son got invited to a birthday party the other day and the mom had on the invitation “please no presents, enough already!” Isn’t that fantastic? Enough already; we have everything we may need and then some so enough already.

I was doing a reading for someone this afternoon when we were talking about being grateful for all that is. I was telling this person that we have a choice in how to take something on that comes our way. If I wanted to right now I could find 10 things to complain about but I could also find 10 things to be grateful for so then why not make the choice of being grateful, content, happy and present.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of

Totally grateful!

Friday, May 21, 2010

My phone broke ...

My phone broke a few weeks ago while we were in Dallas. I was trying to change the song I was listening to while working out when it just slipped from my hands to fall between the pedals of the elliptical machine. The guy at the Apple store called his buddies over to see the inside of an Iphone which apparently none of them had seen before.

I couldn’t get another phone while we were in Dallas so I was without a phone for about three days. It was very liberating in a lot of ways. I found myself checking email and reading NPR news a little too much where it was consuming too much of me. I enjoyed the lack of texting, answering email and checking Facebook updates constantly. It was a little bit of a hassle coordinating with my husband if he was picking me up but I managed. It was fun to be unplugged. It’s only when I got back to Denver that I was getting a little worried about not having a phone; what if the kids fell at school, what if someone called, what if I missed an email … and so on. I had to stop to think how absurd these thoughts and how much I’ve started to rely on this thing that never leaves my side anymore. Nevertheless I went and bought a new phone.

I feel that there’s a reason for everything and I honestly thought that my phone broke just to allow me the few days of being unplugged to calm my senses. I thought that until my new phone started acting up. I synced it to my computer where it jumbled up all my contacts; it may have someone name with someone else’s phone number and yet another’s email address. It also jumbled them up on my computer. The other thing that happened was that it totally messed up my calendar; it dropped a lot of appointments and added some upwards of 15 times. I found this part to be really annoying until I had to stop and think about why this happened.

I realized that I’ve been saying that I needed to clean up my contact list for a while. So guess what was handed to me after months of saying that. The part of the calendar being messed up was a little more challenging. I had to go out and buy a planner because the one on my phone was irritating me so much. I spent a couple of hours one afternoon inputting all my appointments and when I was done I realized the reason for all of it. It felt so good and grounding to be sitting down and writing. I realized that I hardly ever get the opportunity to write with a pencil and paper anymore. I thought about my uncle who is an author and how he hand writes all his articles and books on paper. I’m not even sure he owns a computer. Now I realize that it was another way to unplug me; it was moving me away from my phone and computer. I have really enjoyed having a planner for these past few days and I will probably keep one from now on.

It’s essential to feel that sense of calm and grounding. Although I start every day with a meditation, I still feel that by three o’clock in the afternoon my senses are a little off at times. The best days are when I get to do another meditation around that time. That hasn’t been the case lately though which is why I feel my phone with all its frustrations has helped me to get back to center again. Honestly, I don’t even enjoy texting and emailing, I find the phone call where I talk to a person on the other end to be much more gratifying. I love to hear a voice which allows me to get a sense of how someone is feeling because at the end of the day we are humans with emotions.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of

Much more grounded!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Review of "Experience Your Good Now" by Louise L. Hay

I just finished reading Experience Your Good Now! by Louise L. Hay and it was great! This book was sent to me for free by Hay House so that I can read it and then write a review about it. I have to say that I read the whole book but honestly I was stuck on the first chapter with my thoughts.

The objective of the book is to release any blocks you may have around certain areas of your life examples being health, addictions, work, friends, love life and so on. Every chapter is devoted to one of the topics mentioned and starts with a checklist of negative thoughts you may have around them. Once you’ve figured out the negative thoughts then through affirmations and mirror work you will be able to shift the once negative thought to a positive one which ultimately will lead to health and happiness.

I am going to really focus on the first chapter which was about health because it truly was the one that resonated with me the most. It seems like for the past few months I’ve been getting sick about once a month. I just couldn’t figure out what was going on. Louise talks about the idea that we contribute to every illness in our body because the body is basically a mirror of our inner thoughts. I always believe that we are not victims of anything but instead creators of our universe so I started to wonder why I would manifest an illness of some sort every few weeks. She continues to say that every disease that we have is a teacher. These two thoughts have made me think a lot; what was I thinking on a subconscious level to allow these illnesses to manifest and then what were they trying to teach me.

The next part of the chapter started with the exercises. One of the questions to answer was “what, if anything, did you enjoy about being sick as a child?” That immediately made me remember that I loved the attention I got from everyone. Then I fast-forwarded to my current situation to realize that I still love getting the attention especially from my husband. I remembered back 12 years ago when I got sick and he made me chicken soup. It was by far the worst chicken soup I had ever tasted but also the best because it was soup that was meant to make me feel better. He was taking care of me and I loved it.

Every chapter ends with positive thoughts and affirmations. I love affirmations because I feel they are a simple method to keep you in line with what it is you’d really like to manifest and bring into your experience. I do affirmations all the time for anything and everything. Very simply affirmations are positive phrases that you repeat over and over until your goal has been achieved.

I don’t know if this realization will prevent me from catching that cold or getting an upset stomach quite as easily but I do know that it feels great to release some blockages that did not resonate with my being any longer.

I recommend this book to anyone who has a certain area of their life they’d like to improve. It certainly is a book to hold on to and refer to when blockages do happen in your life.

You may buy the book from Hay House, Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of

My body is healthy and vibrant!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

The answer is never!

I was discussing the Law of Attraction with someone the other day. For those not familiar with the Law of Attraction I'll sum it up in a couple of sentences. The Law of Attraction talks to us about being able to manifest anything in our lives as long as we truly believe that we can. Our thoughts attract experiences into our lives so therefore if we think it’ll happen, feel it’ll happen and believe it’ll happen then it must happen. Of course many, many books have been written trying to help people understand this amazingly powerful law in the Universe so this little explanation certainly did not do it justice.

This friend was asking me when she should give up on her manifestation. My answer was never; never give up on your dream. Why would anyone give up on something if it didn’t happen within a certain time frame? That doesn’t make any sense to me. No matter what it is that you’re trying to bring into your experience why would you ever give up on it? Sometimes we give up on something right before it was destined to show up. We are a fast-paced society that expects fast results. It seems like everything must fit in this incredibly small window in time so when something doesn’t make that cut we tend to ditch it.

I was doing a reading for someone this afternoon when I mentioned this concept to them. This person wrote a book and was wondering when it would take off. I gave him the thought of allowing the book to be successful for the rest of his life. Sometimes when we release our iron-grip hold on something is exactly when it shows up.

I absolutely love the concept of feeling and imagining your wish as already happened every night before going to sleep. I would add to that the thought of "do that ritual until your want appears." If it's a relationship that you desire then imagine yourself already in a healthy, fantastic one every night until that partner appears. If it’s taking a vacation in Tahiti then every night imagine yourself soaking up the rays on a beautiful Tahitian beach until that happens. Don’t worry about how it’s going to manifest just trust that it will.

To allow your dream to become a reality, you absolutely need to feel it with all your being. “Like cures like” is an age-old homeopathy concept and “like attracts like” is its Law of Attraction equivalent. Use it to your advantage!

Patience is a virtue that is absolutely necessary when trying to bring an experience into our lives. You could probably look back at history books to discover that some of our greatest thinkers and artists were not well-known until way after they had passed yet they never gave up on producing more books and art. This same concept will apply to everyone else and anything they may want to manifest into their lives.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of

To sign up for “An Evening of Meditation” on May 20th at 7 pm you may email me to or call 303.478.1642

Never giving up!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Happy Anniversary my love

Today is my anniversary. I have been married to my wonderful husband for ten years, all of which have been fantastic! Our civil ceremony was held in the home of our wonderful friends in Houston on January 30, 2000. That’ll always be a special day for us because it truly is the day we tied the knot so to speak and it was Super Bowl Sunday after all. May 13, 2000 is the day that I wore my wedding dress and walked down the aisle to promise that I will be with my husband for the rest of time.

We got married in Fajardo, Puerto Rico at the El Conquistador Resort. Our wedding vows were made atop a 300 foot cliff that overlooked the water. The weather was absolutely fantastic, most of our friends and family were there; it truly was a magical day. I remember my brother walking me down the aisle when I looked to my right to see a beautiful sailboat in the water and a few clouds in the sky. I thought to myself that was a good sign; our life would be smooth sailing and beautiful together.

I can’t say that we haven’t had our fair share of trials together but I can say for the most part it has been smooth sailing and beautiful. I can also say I couldn’t imagine a better partner to have during all those tough times. It has made us stronger and more committed to each other. I love my husband today more than ever. Each new day brings new adventures together that I am excited to take with him.

The idea of getting married on an island was inspired by the following words that I told my husband “if I had it my way, everyone at our wedding would be tanned, tipsy and happy. What better place to achieve that than an island wedding.”

Our wedding song is Edwin McCain’s “I’ll Be” to which we danced the “money move” to. The “money move” is where my husband holds me really close and tips me backwards; the money move has certainly been an inspiration to our marriage.

I’d like to dedicate this post to my husband who I find to be the handsomest, most breath-taking man. So Louis Peter Salfi III the following words from our wedding song are dedicated to you:

“The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath
And emeralds from mountains thrust towards the sky
Never revealing their depth

And tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

And I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
And I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

And rain falls angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed
And you're my survival, you're my living proof
My love is alive, and not dead

And tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love.
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

And I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I`ll be love suicide
And I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

And I dropped out, I burned up, I fought my way back from the dead,
I tuned in, I turned on, remembered the thing that you said.

And I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
And I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

The greatest fan of your life”

With all my love,

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

It's a privilege

This past Sunday was Mother's day; Happy Mother's Day to all you mothers and grandmothers out there. We went to Dallas to celebrate with my mother-in-law and my sister-in-law. We went out for a fantastic brunch at Sambuca’s with all three generations; four parents, one grandparent and five kids, it was absolutely awesome.

I started to think about how great it is to be a mother and what that has really meant for me personally. It has certainly been a journey. I remember before my oldest son was born I wouldn’t even consider the option of quitting my job to stay home and raise him. He was about two weeks old when I was staring at him in my arms, he was totally content just being there all snuggled up when I thought “no one is going to take better care of him than I am and that is my job.” I called my husband to tell him that I’m quitting my job. Of course, he knew all along that I was going to do that. I just needed to get to a place where it was my decision. That phone call I made to my manager to tell him I was quitting must have been the hardest of my life. I remember I was sweating in my car while talking to him. Now I think back as to why it stressed me out so much and realize it was because I was entering into a world that I knew nothing about. Babies do not come with manuals, they come with personalities!

I fought the mom thing a long time. I went through a phase of not knowing who I was. The hardest was answering the question of “what do you do?” I would always answer “well right now I’m at home taking care of my little guy but I am an engineer by education and I worked for Nortel and T-Mobile at one point.” When I had to check the box of “homemaker” rather than “engineer” that was a little harder; I always wished there was a blank line by that box where I could explain who I was before becoming a person who took care of a baby all day.

I did go to Homeopathy school while I was pregnant with my second son. I thought that I would be able to have some sort of a part-time thing going on after he was born but he brought out the same feelings in me again. I wanted to be home with him all the time to breastfeed on demand, rock him to sleep and just enjoy him. I would sometimes complain to friends about staying home with the kids when they would answer “gosh you’re so lucky. I would love to stay home but we just can’t afford it.” That would always send me back to a place of gratitude which is where I feel I need to be as a mother anyway.

I always thank my kids on Mother’s day for giving me the opportunity to become one. My life is so much richer because of those two little boys that decided to make it and one little girl that stopped a few weeks short of coming to Earth. My five year old niece asked me why I had only two kids and not more this past weekend. She has three older brothers so our family probably seemed way too small or maybe she, like many other kids these days, is super intuitive and was picking up on my thoughts of that same exact thought. She is adorable by the way so I had to tell her that if I could guarantee one like her I would go for more. I really don’t know if that answer satisfied her but we seemed to move away from that subject. That could have partly been due to the fact that her dad brought her a plate of what was apparently the best bacon any kid had ever tasted.

I always wonder if there are more kids in my future and if there are I would welcome them with loving open arms. I gave the long drawn out explanation to “what do you do right now?” so many times that I realized the person asking me that question didn’t care for a long winded reply and quite honestly neither do I. I feel lucky and privileged to have been given the opportunity to be a mother and I constantly pray that I am the best mother I can be.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of

To sign up for “An Evening of Meditation” on May 20th at 7 pm you may email me to or call 303.478.1642

The mom who cried at the baseball game last night because my boy scored three runs!


Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I loved it!!

Paris was absolutely fantastic! I loved every minute that we were there. I had been to Paris before but it certainly was a different feel to be there with my husband. Everything seemed to be a little more romantic and a little more charming.

Everything we did was definitely awe inspiring; there’s so much history and culture at every corner that it’s almost hard to absorb it all. The Eifel tower is amazing; it was humbling to stand at the base of it and look up. Hearing about the Arc de Triomphe is one thing but to stand right at it and look at the “tomb of the unknown soldier” allows you the opportunity to take that moment of silence to revere all that it represents. Seeing the “Mona Lisa” in the Louvre or “The Thinker” sculpture at the Rodin Museum or Monet’s “Water Lilies” at the Orangerie Museum among other fabulous art pieces was absolutely breath-taking. It was fantastic to be in the presence of art that has been admired by many.

I loved everything but most of all I loved strolling down the streets to look up and see the most incredible ornate lamp post or water fountain that I’ve ever seen in my life . The Notre Dame and Sacre Coeur are amazingly beautiful but so were the other churches that were not as famous but just as ornate. It really was about walking around and just taking in all the incredible art and architecture that was everywhere.

I especially loved sitting in cafes and restaurants. The French have it figured out; they chew their food slowly, enjoy sitting with their friends and generally do not feel the need to turn a table over. The French aren’t in a rush to give you your bill either. I think we had to ask for our bill four times at one of the restaurants. We were forced to slow down. We were forced to enjoy sipping the wine and chewing our food rather than gulping and inhaling. By day three we had figured it out; we sat down to eat at a fantastic Lebanese restaurant called Noura where we were tempted to gulp and inhale because we were hungry but instead I told my husband “let’s eat like the French” to which he answered “you mean let’s enjoy it.” And we did! It was awesome!

It got me thinking as to why I don’t allow myself that simple pleasure in the United States. My youngest son is not feeling well today so he got to stay at home. I took him to Whole Foods with me where I picked lunch up for him. My thought was that I would bring it home for him to eat while I did laundry and got things done so when he asked to eat in their outdoor seating area I had to think about it. I thought to myself that if I was in France I would sit down, enjoy the sunshine and let my kid enjoy his food. I also thought that I’d like to teach my boys how to slow down and enjoy life as well so I’d better set the right example. So we did and it was fantastic!

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You may leave a comment below, email me to or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of

To sign up for “An Evening of Meditation” on May 20th at 7 pm you may email me to or call 303.478.1642

Chewing and sipping from now on!