Thursday, January 27, 2011

Knowing when you've had enough

I think it’s huge when the day comes that you decide not to take it anymore. I have always had a problem with saying no and setting boundaries.

It has literally taken me years in certain situations to say, “Enough is enough!” After going through spiritual type classes and realizing that boundaries are one of my major lessons in this life, I’ve gotten better.

Boundaries will show up in all different forms. It could be your friend asking you to something that is outrageous, it could be your boss asking way to much of you at work, it could be your kids not respecting your space, it could be someone constantly interrupting you while you talk and so on, I’m sure you get the gist.

Recognize when something doesn’t feel right

It’s huge to recognize when your boundaries are being crossed and when it’s time to say no. It has everything to do with how you feel about something. Everything in life will boil down to that if you allow it to do so.

How does that make me feel? Do I really want to do that? Is that something that is in my best interest to do? All of these are essential questions to ask yourself whenever you’ve realized that you’re starting to get derailed.

It’s important to recognize that certain things can feel good for a while and then they don’t. As long as the relationship feels good, stay in it. Once it starts to make you feel bad, it’s time to evaluate.

The relationship I’m referring to could be anything. It’s your relationship with your job, with your friends, and even with the book you are reading.

Take action

I have stopped plenty of books a quarter of the way through, because I had gotten out of them what I needed and there was no need to continue on.

I’m not saying jump ship when things start heading south a little, but I am saying recognize when things are really not working for you and do something about them. All it takes sometimes is telling someone how you feel.

It’s so much easier to be authentic then to kid yourself into thinking that things are going well. That turns into internal anxiety that is not fun to go through.

I’d love to hear from you!

You may leave a comment below, email me to mary@marysalfi.com or find me on Facebook by becoming a fan of marysalfi.com

Feeling better about my boundary setting!

Mary

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